Let us boldly ask what it says about ourselves if we cannot pull back from our addiction to digital distractions. For it is an addiction; we are no better off than the alcoholic who cannot avoid the bar or the gambler the casino. Those with a compulsion to constantly check in have lives like this: They awake each day and their first act is to review the messages left by others, always terrified that they may have missed something that someone else wanted on a whim just hours or minutes ago. Their second effort is to divide up their day based not on what they should accomplish in pursuit of their dreams but, rather, on the hours they must spend responding to the needs and requests of others. They reply with equal frenzy and devotion to one and all, to both influencers and idiots, their addiction to meet others’ demands making no distinction, giving no priority. All day, they are busy accomplishing nothing but responding to everything. There is no vision, only reaction—a self-imposed terror that they are falling behind. Their aim in life, if we can call it that, is to ‘get through’ it all, to ‘catch up’ in a rat race that they should never have entered and will never win.”
-Brendon Buchard from the Motivation Manifesto
What if we could live our day creating instead of reacting?
Imagine starting the day with peace, calm and a feeling of being ready for the day rather then being taken in by the chaos of the morning.
How would that change your day?
What if we could feel as if we accomplished all that we needed to each day?
In our culture of digital information, we are bombarded ALL the time with messages, advertisements, blogs and information for our minds to consume. We are given information to peruse that is excellent, however, when we have so much of it, there can be no depth to the information.
How much time do you spend reading a blog?
How much time do you spend clearing out your email box?
How much time do you spend perusing facebook/instagram?
Time is the most valuable commodity we have in our lives. It is the one thing that you cannot get back. How we spend it determines the type of life we will live.
It is the small moments that create our days. The little joys that we often overlook in our hurry to get to the next thing, to get to work, to get to class, to get to that activity. What would life look if we took the time to really look at the art that your child brings home without worrying about where you will put it, and what would it look like if you really examined that rock that has sparked your child’s interest? It's these small moments that are the bedrock of memories and the foundation of motherhood, being present is the ultimate gift to anyone. I like to think of each one as a twinkling light, with all the moments creating a string of twinkling lights.
These days it has become so common to leave the phone on the dinner table when out with friends, just in case. Its common for people to answer a text during a conversation without pausing, its also become the new normal to answer a cellphone in the middle of a conversation with a person right in front of you. These new “normals” are completely disrupting our ability to ground ourselves and get present in our lives. Our distractions have become an addiction.
The way to wean off is one step at a time. Presence is a muscle that takes time and deliberate attention to develop.
Three things you can do today to help you purposefully disconnect:
- Our brains are more vulnerable first thing in the morning, so allow yourself to rise, breathe, stretch before checking your phone
- Next time you have the urge to scroll social media, determine why. Are you bored, tired, procrastinating? Set specific times that you will check social media and stick to them.
- Allow yourself an hour before bed to relax with a real book and the phone in another room. The last few moments and thoughts before sleep will be what your subconscious thinks about all night. Make it good.
You can do this one step at a time.
If you want help, I am currently taking on 3 new private coaching clients to help you clarify your vision and close the gap from where you are to where you want to be. Accountability makes all the difference. If this calls to you, email back and we'll set up call to see if its a good fit.
With gratitude,
Amisha
